By Tanvir Ahmad Siddiqui

shoots from the hip, gets on his foot

After his famous last punch that commando less of a military and more of a political scheming is now again a charmer on stands of polity fun fare. The same charming man who galloped on the saddle of unaccountable squares of power & prerogatives for over a decade  and through  all those yrs he was made to understand by his cronies that he was the one and only who knew better than all how to grab, grub and seize power. The same charming man about to dance with that last bullet in his pistol is actually haunted by his own loss of influence. He yet deprived himself of that unaccountable power and influence all by his own follies mainly because of ignoring the simple fact of life that what ever goes up must come down sooner or later.  For almost a decade living happily and proudly within glorious moments of success one obviously gets indulged with a fallacy of sheer self confidence. Feeling of  continued self success mainly because of sitting intact within a safety cabin of an armored sports vehicle  is altogether different but still very ecstatic no doubt. In moments of ecstasy & pleasure we abruptly shut down any erratic alarm bell system that in a way disrupts our pleasure of illustrious moments.   While in our pleasures we normally consider those alarm bells nothing but a noise pollution. I know a Richie-rich friend of mine belonging to a very influential and well connected family is fond of driving world renowned hi-fi luxury sports cars but always hates to be fastened himself by seat belts. He has found a very simple but interesting solution to shut that inbuilt device of warning alarm bells and it’s blinking light on the dash panel of his cars. To permanently shut those alarm bells he always keeps the metal tabs of seat belts directly inserted into the lock buckle so as to sit unfastened on the belt loop and enjoy the drive.

More or less same remained the case with  our Ex-President   who for nine years enjoyed the ecstasy and thrill of his armored sports car sitting intact on driving seat but mainly remained unfastened with safety belts rolled out for him from that buckle of Constitution. He and his fellow enthusiasts always considered they were extra–constitutionally very safe cruising along with him on board of his armored sports vehicle.  He and his dearest front seat companion Mr Shaukat Aziz  in  pleasure of their self confidence never liked those early warning alarm bells and muted every system that was capable of disrupting their  life style.  Every thing and moment  for all of them was hunky dory on and before the evening of Friday 9th of March 2007. The day when in their sheer self confidence on their driving skills and the capacity of their armored sports coupe they made a stunt attempt in top gear to pass through in between the Judiciary and The Media.

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But that stunt attempt unfortunately turned out to be  like smashing into a bull  simultaneously hitting on to a concrete wall.. On 2nd of November same year he once again miscalculated to give another blow of his that famous last punch. But the target that he considered soft unfortunately again turned out to be as hard as a rock that dragged them all between a rock and the hard place. His dearest friend Mr. Shaukat Aziz (also now famous as Shortcut Aziz) discreetly abandoned him right there in same critical condition but despite in his hurry & haste  never forgot to pick and pack up all those bounties from our ToshaKhana.

Thereafter taking a flight from the scene of accident Mr. Shaukat Aziz  now somewhere backstage is shrugging his shoulders and heard to be saying “Hey! its not my faaault!  He was at the driving seat not meee” Most of the than fellow enthusiasts of Mr. Ex-President on board who always cherished and shared his self confidence and capability of his driving skills quietly slipped and sneaked off his board one after the other.  Thereafter and subsequently we have seen that in elections of February 2008 and consequently in bi-elections not a single candidate even like his that thick and thin Sheikh Rashid and so many other known stalwarts  never ever used the name and shadow of Pervez Mushurruf  to bring up any strength, vigor and enthusiasm in their Electioneering campaigns. Life is like that for sure and we always remain prune to any misfortune. Those slings and arrows of our fortune never work forever because the sling finally breaks somewhere at a point and the club that contains those slings and arrows at last gets empty. Despite all our efforts, our skills, our smartness and our ability of tactical maneuverings we remain trivial to fall like a comet and  fragment in a trice.

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Their collection story of all bounties from  Taosha Khana also gained a wide media attention. Those were the days when our media trumpeted good for nothing with screaming headlines that our Mr. Ex-President  and his favorite PM Mr. Sahukat Aziz  got no cheap gifts for themselves and their First & Second Ladies from national TaoshaKhana.   I really did not find any juice and thrill in those stories taking them as nothing but yet another storm in the media cup.  What the heck and why  after all that time,   those media men and women bashed Mr. Bush and other royal highnesses and dignitaries  of the world who rewarded our the than President and Prime Minister with so cheap gifts in recognition of their commemorative  personal services for Pakistan. Their most profound services that dragged us all into stretched and over stretched fight against terrorism.  It was not fair to criticize our poor President at that NROised safe exit gate especially when according to the reports he  very kindly and mercifully had already paid at least  Rs.15/- for that brief case  which was so honorably rewarded to him by his caretaker Mr. George W. Bush.  What was the fuss all about despite of the sacrifice  of  his skin ( by giving up his Uniform).  What more than Rs.15/- a poor President of Pakistan could give to the exchequer especially at the time when he was vacating the Army House and the Presidential Camp Office and when he really had to find a place to live in London.

Instead of bashing up our poor ex-President our media men & women should actually had gone after Mr. G. W. Bush and his fellow Americans who  had once again insulted us and our President  by rewarding him with so cheap a brief case that was officially estimated worth of Rs100/- only.  To buy a house in London our poor Mr. Ex-President most probably had to sell all those state gifts he carried away like Rolex Watches / Jewelry boxes / paintings / gadgets and other endless number of valuable items.   Media enthusiasts were  also very unfair and unkind to raise their good for nothing hue and cry on a petty issue like an illegal untitled  Bijlee ka Meter because our Mr. Ex-President  was uprightly honest and kind enough to at least had connected some kind of a WAPDA  meter at his farm house in Chuk Shehzad despite of the fact that he could otherwise very easily fit in  a Koonda Connection.

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Anyhow that good and bad but exciting time is over and we have already seen the good and bad result of his that famous Last Punch.  Now let us all see what happens to that Last and final Bullet he says that he is left with in his personal pistol and  with which he has now announced to dance  high-handed  on stands of Polity Fun Fare. It’s all a matter of Time and Space because life is not a matter of milestones but of moments. To kick off his active political campaign he has asked the media to provide him a space.  As of now that NPC (National Media Press Council)  on which he had drawn that Iron Curtain with his blatant power now seeks his pardon before he is provided with another  space. To re-gain that reasonable space firstly he may have  to go through so many such blots and  pardons from Kohlu to LalMasjid and from murder of BB   to the case of Aafia Siddiqui and   missing persons, with that that May 10 carnage of Karachi and what not?   Anyway and  anyhow Mr. Mushurruf and his brand new set and bunch of cronies now claim that he has fan ship of almost Two hundred thousands on FB. Now let us see how these great numbers of his fans help him comparatively much better way and more effectively than all those endless number of enthusiastic fans and friends of Mr. Imran Khan.